Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Peanut Butter and Jelly

“We go to together like peanut butter and jelly”. “We’re like two peas in a pod”. “I’m stuck on you like white on rice”. Okay so maybe you haven’t heard of the last one but the first two phrases, I hope, are pretty familiar. Now these great food analogies are most of the time used when describing friends that are pretty close. Many times these are the friends that are inseparable on the playground, eat lunch together on a daily basis, or regularly make some form of communication to keep in touch. These friends are the lifelong ones that you know, through hell and high water, will be there for you because they care about you. But the real question is are you reciprocating that feeling?

Think about it, we have been blessed with some truly incredible people in our lives that care so much about us! Our best friends, family members, coaches, mentors and so many more are all part of our support team. These are the people that have continued to help us achieve our goals, been there for us when we are down, and helped us to pick ourselves up and keep moving! They are our biggest cheerleaders, best motivators and sometimes our own personal therapists. But do we do the same for them?

I know that I would love to say yes to being there every time for those people I care but I know that there are times in my life that I have not held up my end of the deal when it comes to relationships. Looking back I can pinpoint times in my life when I could have done a better job at being a friend, role model, or teammate and I am sure that there are numerous times when I have not held up my end of the deal and totally didn’t even realize it. Let’s be honest we are all guilty of it, maybe it was forgetting a friends birthday, not taking the time out to give a few pointers to the kid playing on the basketball team we are coaching or not trying to reach a compromise and instead just storming out. The key is to try and remember that we are supposed to hold up our end of the bargain in every relationship and to continue to not just take, take, take but to give in return.

A quote that I have used to help me to keep this in perspective is by Scott Stratten. Scott was in a TED talk that I was advised to watch and had some very interesting and key points that were interesting to think on. The big message he had to share however was this. “Being a big deal, isn’t a big deal, especially if we don’t remember to be a bigger deal to the people we care about.”

Take some time and think on that. If we aren’t a bigger deal to those around us that helped let us become a “big deal” than we aren’t really a big deal. Our accomplishments, our successes all become worth nothing if we don’t take the time to give back to those who took the time and effort to support us and helped us to become successful. These friends, family members, coaches and mentors have helped you achieve the status of “big deal” and because of that they deserve a little pat on the back. So think back to those few people you consider the peanut butter to your jelly, the next pea in your pod; are you showing them the support that they have shown you?

“If you go looking for a friend, you’re going to find they’re very scarce. If you go out to be a friend, you’ll find them everywhere.”- Zig Ziglar